Finding podcasts and Emotional Spending

This week for the first time ever I listened to a podcast. Yes I am late to the party as always with these digital things but I thought it was a great idea to do while I was doing my walking training for my big hike.

My podcast of choice was the lovely Fearne Cotton’s Happy Place podcast. In the episode Fearne was chatting to Radhi Devlukia-Shetty and it was called Discipline, personalised nutrition and Tesco trips. It was fabulous and I was enthralled. I didn’t realise how far I had walked whilst listening. Fearne and Radhi talked about so many things, purpose, habits boundaries and guidelines and how they allow her to be in control but it doesn’t mean it is rigid but allows her to be free. As a self confessed control freak I found it really interesting.

In one section they were talking about short term gratification from food and the quick dopamine hit you can get from food – short term pleasure versus the long term impact. I think they were talking about a doughnut. This got me thinking about the similarities you can get from emotional spending – we all do it. I like to think I have my spending under control as I blog about it but I still get a quick fix from going into a charity shop and buying.

In today's society, it's soooo easy to succumb to the allure of buying things we don't necessarily need. Whether it's a new gadget, trendy clothing, or indulgent treats, many of us find ourselves making purchases driven not by necessity, but by emotions. This phenomenon, known as emotional spending, can have significant implications for our financial well-being and emotional health.

Emotional spending occurs when individuals use shopping as a means of coping with or regulating their emotions. It's a behaviour that can manifest in various forms, from impulse purchases made in response to stress or sadness to retail therapy sessions aimed at boosting mood or self-esteem. While occasional indulgence is normal, frequent emotional spending can lead to financial instability, debt, and a cycle of emotional dependence on material possessions.

So, what drives emotional spending? There are several psychological factors at play:

Emotional Triggers.

Emotional spending often occurs in response to specific triggers, such as stress, boredom, loneliness, or even happiness. When faced with these emotions, individuals may turn to shopping as a way to alleviate negative feelings or enhance positive ones.

Instant Gratification.

In today's fast-paced world, we're accustomed to instant gratification. Shopping offers an immediate sense of pleasure and excitement, providing a temporary escape from life's challenges. However, this instant gratification is short-lived and can quickly lead to buyer's remorse.

Social Comparison

Social media (and one of the reasons I call myself a digital dinosaur and now only have Instagram due to this blog) exacerbates the tendency to compare ourselves to others. Seeing friends or influencers flaunting their latest purchases can create a sense of inadequacy or FOMO (fear of missing out), prompting us to splurge on items we don't need in an attempt to keep up with the Joneses.

Self-Esteem Boost

For some people, buying expensive or luxurious items serves as a status symbol and a way to boost self-esteem. Owning desirable possessions can create a sense of identity and validation, albeit temporarily.

Escape from Reality

Shopping can provide a temporary escape from life's stressors and responsibilities. It offers a distraction from problems or negative emotions, allowing individuals to momentarily forget their troubles. However, this escape is fleeting and can lead to long-term financial consequences.

While emotional spending may provide temporary relief, it often leads to guilt, regret, and financial strain in the long run. Overspending can result in debt, depleted savings, and a cycle of dependency on material possessions to regulate emotions. To break free from this pattern, it's essential to cultivate healthy coping mechanisms and develop a mindful approach to spending. This does not mean going without maybe just having some control.

Here are some steps to try and break the cycle;

Identify Triggers

Pay attention to the emotions or situations that trigger your urge to spend impulsively. Whether it's stress, boredom, or social pressure, understanding your triggers is the first step toward overcoming emotional spending.

Practice Self-Awareness

Before making a purchase, pause and ask yourself whether you genuinely need the item or if you're buying it to fulfill an emotional need. Take a moment to reflect on your motivations and consider healthier alternatives for managing your emotions. Maybe pretend Martin Lewis is on your shoulder repeating one of his mantras.

Set Limits and Budget

Establishing a budget (or plan) and sticking to it can help curb impulsive spending habits. Allocate specific amounts for discretionary purchases and prioritize your needs over wants. Setting limits empowers you to make mindful choices and avoid overspending.

Find Healthy Outlets

Instead of turning to shopping as a coping mechanism, explore alternative ways to manage your emotions. Engage in activities that bring you joy and fulfillment, such as exercise, hobbies, spending time with loved ones, or practicing mindfulness and meditation.

Ask for help and talk.

If emotional spending has become a persistent problem that's impacting your financial stability and well-being, don't hesitate to seek support from friends, family, or a professional therapist. Talking about your struggles can provide perspective and guidance on overcoming unhealthy spending habits.

Emotional spending is very very common – everybody does it. Just have some control. One of our clients has come up with some rules to stop her overspending and has found that she is getting more satisfaction from seeing her debt go down rather than spending. She was having quite a bit of takeaways and always regretted it especially as she was an amazing cook.

In conclusion, emotional spending is a common yet detrimental behavior that can have profound effects on both our finances and emotional well-being. By understanding the psychological factors driving this behavior and adopting healthier coping mechanisms, we can break free from the cycle of impulse buying and cultivate a more mindful and fulfilling approach to consumption. Remember, true happiness and fulfillment cannot be bought – they come from within.

Do you have any good rules or ideas to help you control emotional spenging?

We would love to hear from you

Laura and Nicola x